ADHD and Executive Function: Why You Can’t Follow Through
Do you have a constant desire to do more with your life, but somehow can’t execute? If you’ve got the ideas, the plans and the half-started projects but can never quite get there, understanding ADHD and executive function might be the missing piece.
This year I was diagnosed with ADHD. To my friends and family, and honestly to myself, it came as a shock to absolutely nobody. My whole life I’ve been a chronic overachiever while also feeling like I was failing at everything. If that sounds familiar, this one’s for you.
The quiet daydreamer
As a quiet, unassuming, “dainty” child, I lacked confidence and struggled to focus at school. In subjects I didn’t enjoy (maths, I’m looking at you), I’d switch off and use the lesson as uninterrupted daydreaming time. I’d imagine the places I’d live one day, the things I’d achieve, the hobbies I’d try. I had a vivid imagination, but only for the things that lit me up.
That pattern followed me into adulthood. Ideas have always come easily to me. It’s the follow-through that’s exhausting.
ADHD and executive function: why we chase the NEW
There’s something complex about living with ADHD. You have a deep desire to do more with your life, but there always seems to be an invisible wall between you and getting there. And more often than not, the person holding that wall up is you.
ADHD brains are wired for novelty. The dopamine rush of a new project, a new country, a new person or a new passion is intense and all-consuming. It gives us so much energy. But in my experience, that rush fades. What’s left behind is a list of unfinished tasks, ideas that never got followed through, and often a good case of burnout. Unless something genuinely matters to our future, the excitement drains away and we’re back to frantically googling the next thing to be interested in.
If you’ve ever wondered why you start everything and finish nothing, the link between ADHD and executive function is a big part of the answer. It isn’t laziness, and it isn’t a character flaw.
What is executive function in ADHD?
Executive function is the set of mental skills we use to plan, prioritise, break tasks into steps, manage time and follow through. ADHD directly affects these skills. Dr Russell Barkley, one of the leading researchers on ADHD and executive function, describes ADHD as a problem of doing what you know, rather than knowing what to do. You can read more about how executive function affects starting and finishing tasks on CHADD’s executive function page.
That really lands for me, because the desire and drive are completely real. You know exactly what you need to do. You just can’t seem to get yourself there.
The way I describe it, both to clients and to myself, is like peering over a wall at your potential. You can see it. You know it’s there. But you can’t quite climb over. It leaves you with a nagging feeling of always being two steps behind where you “should” be.
When the goal is too big to have a first step
People with ADHD love a big goal. Big goals match our dreams, and many of us are deeply purpose-driven. The trouble is that time blindness is real, and we often have no idea how long things will actually take.
So we set a huge goal, look at it, and freeze. There’s no obvious first step, so we procrastinate. This is where ADHD and executive function collide: planning and breaking things down are exactly the skills that feel hardest. That creates a mental restlessness, a sense of urgency and panic that we’ll never get there.
Plenty of people feel this from time to time. With ADHD, it can feel constant, like a background hum of imposter syndrome and the sense that you’re about to be told off. Living with that is exhausting, and it can feed cycles of burnout, along with the anxiety and depression that so often show up alongside ADHD.
Why the inner critic is so loud for ADHDers
When you’re constantly chasing your tail, never quite reaching your goals and always feeling like you’re heading for the naughty step, life gets tiring. It affects your relationships, and it chips away at your self-worth.
In somatic parts work (something I’m trained in), we get to know the different parts of ourselves. For many people with ADHD, the inner critic is one of the loudest. It’s been there for as long as you can remember, telling you you’re not good enough or that you need to focus, often echoing what teachers and family said when you were younger.
On top of that, we build up a track record of starting things, flipping between them and not finishing them. Every abandoned project becomes more “evidence” for the critic.
Here’s the reframe I’ve come to: a lot of what we label as failure is actually curiosity. Not everything you’re curious about is meant to last, and that’s OK. Living well with ADHD comes down to two things – learning to support your executive function, and finding something you care about enough to keep coming back to. That might be building a business, a creative pursuit, or sharing your quirks on social media.
How to work with ADHD and executive function challenges
As a coach who works with neurodivergent and highly sensitive clients, and someone trained in mindfulness and somatics, here’s what genuinely helps me and the people I work with when ADHD and executive function struggles show up.
Get it out of your head and onto paper. Your plans become real when you write them down. Break every big goal into small, specific steps, so small that the first one feels almost too easy.
Plan once a week (and don’t overplan). I have a Notion planning session every Sunday and tick things off visually as I go. That visual tick is a little dopamine hit in itself. The trap is overplanning, and I’m still guilty of this. A plan with 40 tasks for Monday is just another wall to peer over.
Lock in your why. When I anchor a task to why it matters, I can ride the motivation wave for much longer. I still get derailed by things like my taxes (which, yes, I still need to do). But when I connect it to what it makes possible, I can chase a semi-decent dopamine hit long enough to actually make progress.
Regulate before you push. When overwhelm hits, a few slow breaths or stepping away from the screen to move your body brings your nervous system back to a place where you can think clearly. You can’t plan your way out of a dysregulated system.
Get support that understands your brain. Working with a coach who specialises in neurodivergence can make a huge difference, because you stop trying to force yourself into systems that were never designed for you.
Ready to stop peering over the wall?
I work with neurodivergent and highly sensitive women to help them step into lives of peace, power and purpose, so they can finally build a life that feels like theirs. If that’s you, take a look at Meant for More, my 1:1 coaching programme.
Not ready for coaching yet? Start with my free Awaken Your More resource and take your first small step today.
Leave a comment and let me know which part of this felt most familiar.
Rachel